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Thursday June 4, 2026

Savvy Living

Savvy Senior

The Letter Your Loved Ones Can Treasure

I want to leave something meaningful for my family, beyond just money or property. I have heard about “legacy letters,” but I do not really know what they are or how to start one. Can you help?

A legacy letter, also known as an ethical will, is a personal note to your loved ones in which you can share your values, life lessons, cherished memories, hopes and guidance. Unlike a traditional will, which focuses on legal matters, a legacy letter expresses your values, experiences and relationships.

Why write a legacy letter?

Many people think their legacy includes only money or property, but the most lasting impact often comes from your words, ideals and life lessons. A legacy letter gives your family something to hold onto, including the stories, traditions and experiences that shaped who you are. Families may return to these letters for comfort, guidance or inspiration long after you are gone. In many ways, it becomes an emotional final testament, answering some of the most important questions about your life.

A legacy letter can also help explain the “why” behind your estate plan in a personal, thoughtful way. While a will addresses the legal and financial details, a legacy letter adds context by explaining why you made certain decisions and what you hope your loved ones will do with what you leave behind. That added perspective can ease misunderstandings, strengthen family connections and facilitate a lasting sense of closeness.

Getting started

Take a moment to reflect on what matters most to you. Consider asking yourself:

  • What values or principles have guided my life?
  • Which moments or experiences am I most grateful for?
  • What mistakes or regrets taught me the most?
  • How do I hope to be remembered by my loved ones?
  • What lessons, advice or guidance do I want to leave my family?
  • Which family traditions, stories or dreams do I want future generations to carry forward?

Keep it personal and sincere. You can write one letter or several personal letters to different family members. Most letters are one to three pages, though there are no strict rules. There are also free legacy letter writing guides available online that provide step-by-step prompts to help you organize your thoughts and begin writing.

If writing is not your forte, consider creating a legacy video. Speak directly to your loved ones, sharing stories, guidance and heartfelt reflections. Most smartphones now record high-quality video and audio, making it easy to create, store and share. A video also captures your voice, expressions and surroundings in a way that a letter simply cannot.

Storing and sharing

Keep letters or videos in a safe and easy-to-find location. Physical letters can go in a secure file, safe or with your attorney, while digital files can be backed up to the cloud or an external drive. You can share them now or wait until after you are gone. It is important to include instructions in your will, so family members know where to find them.

When it comes down to it, a legacy letter or video is truly the heart behind your will. It gives you the chance to share your values, tell your stories and explain the intentions behind your estate plan, leaving your loved ones with words that will matter long after you are gone. Written with generosity, empathy and positivity, a few thoughtful pages or a short video can create an emotional imprint that money alone cannot provide.

Savvy Living is written by Jim Miller, a regular contributor to the NBC Today Show and author of "The Savvy Living” book. Any links in this article are offered as a service and there is no endorsement of any product. These articles are offered as a helpful and informative service to our friends and may not always reflect this organization’s official position on some topics. Jim invites you to send your senior questions to: Savvy Living, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070.


Published May 29, 2026
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